15 Funny Christmas Quotes
8. “The worst gift is a fruitcake. There is only one fruitcake in the entire world, and people keep sending it to each other.” – Johnny Carson
9. “There are three stages of man: he believes in Santa Claus; he does not believe in Santa Claus; he is Santa Claus.” – Bob Phillips
10. “No self-respecting mother would run out of intimidations on the eve of a major holiday.” – Emma Bombeck
11. “I once bought my kids a set of batteries for Christmas with a note on it saying, toys not included.” – Bernard Manning
12. “I stopped believing in Santa Claus when my mother took me to see him in a department store, and he asked for my autograph.” – Shirley Temple
13. “Christmas is the season when you buy this year’s gifts with next year’s money.” – Anonymous
14. “I never believed in Santa Claus because I knew no white man would be coming into my neighborhood after dark.” – Dick Gregory
15. “Mail your packages early so the post office can lose them in time for Christmas.” – Johnny Carson
